so many things happen this week...a bit grey for this week...
just cant be happy as before...
dun noe why...it seem like many of my frenz have many trouble now...
but for those who are not in MMU one...
my secondary school frenz...
A big curious come out in this week and make me confuse+dissappointed...
are the frenz only stand on using and being using basic?
why just seem like nowaday...cant a a sincere or true-hearted frenz like when we were young...
some...u really take them serious as a frenz...
but sometime u will find that,,,they dun think so...they only will ask for ur help when needed...
and after this...i just a like a spare tire...a reserve for them when they are no one to find...
and after the period...when they are getting to know more other frenz...
or just getting better with those who r not before...me---as a reserve...wont be entertain again...
dissappear again....become invinsible again...
I dun mind if u dun really take me as a frenz...but i just hate the kind of feelings become a reserve...
ALL the time i be the reserve no matter at where and when...
shall i just accept this kind of destiny?
so damn hate it...
i was angry with one of my coursemate yesterday...
because of the same problem...
he ask me to help to do one of the homework that he dun really noe how to do...
but actually,,,he lazy to do so...
and I....just too bzbody and help him to do so....but not complete...
coz i send him my work....but he need to differentiate a bit...
human are just like this...when they have something to plead u..sure theywill become so polite and freindly to u...
after getting their purpose,,,the truth coming out...
sending him my work and help him to finish up to 80% ad...but when he getting something wrong...
putting back the problem to me pulak...
so damn f***ing ...
but no because of that person...he just make me think about someone that have the same attitude with him...
all around my study years...i just keep helping anyone who need my help...and at the end of all...
I--the one who just too bzbody,,,too kind hearted...being scold...being discard ...i just really dun like that the feelings to be a fool to oneself...
I din request any from u all...the one i needed most only a thank or a simply smile from u all...
but what i get at the end...really upset me...
no only one times but all the times ...everytimes i just be the bzbody to help u all to do so...
den get a ''good'' enough pay back...
am i just born to deserve this kind of life?
i really hate it! hate it!! hate it!!!
can someone just taking me serious?or just dun asking anything from me...
what i have learn from the beginning till now...
is only ..people just no need to be too helpful...or u just will suffer losses...and to take advantage by other...
and last of all...no one will remember u...
just like u r deserve to do that for them...
iiisshhhhhh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,i just feel so much like to kill all of them!!!
aren frenz just the simple frenz?
why u all need to complicate it?
all the human being must have an advantages to let other take then we just can be frenz?
what a manner world now...
can everything just back to the original and pure one?
just follow the simple thinking of human and maintain it...
so difficult fo me to differentiate a coursemate,frenz,good frenz or ordinary ppl...
and one other things is ...i just REALLY HATE that someone keep pleasing u to taught how to do the work and just act like he know nth...but after u give he sample or what...he just become pro ad then to be a volunteer keep showing and teaching ppl around AND sending those who i get from senior and send to him to any other WITHOUT asking me or permission from that senior...
he dun really noe who is the senior also...then he just keep passing the assignment done by senior,,,make me so embarrassed toward that senior coz he only give me his sample and for purposing guide me to do my homework...
what a life i suffer now with?
i wanna change!!!!!
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